That Floating Poo Was Far Too Meaningful! It's the TV Letdowns of the Year.

As we consider the television offerings of the recent year, a handful of shows stand out not for their excellence, but for their spectacular shortcomings. Ranging from awkward sequels to bafflingly poor documentaries, here are the programmes that had us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote.

The 'Sex and the City' Sequel

Where to begin with this love/hate spin-off? Plagued with dreadful scripts, cringe-inducing character development (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the show struggled to find its footing. For a moment, as the final season started, it seemed as if it had finally found its groove. Then arrived an installment centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the showrunner declared this would be the final series. It concluded on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s toilet full of poo was just way too symbolic. Yet, fans certainly had a hoot picking apart every single “what on earth?” moment. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – twirled around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t let out a little sob?

All’s Fair

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? The answer is a resounding no.’

But that was almost the smallest of this show's problems. The subject of a exceedingly uncommon no-star review, it was hard to know where to begin enumerating the problems. The hilariously leaden dialogue? The tedious glorification of affluence and consumption? The almost wilful parade of cliches? Performances so bad they felt borderline malicious? Suffice it to say “all of the above” and never speak of this series again. Except, a second season has been commissioned, so we’re likely going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Considering the restraining orders, abuse allegations and parental shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d truly have gleaned it from this multi-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various bouts of reckless hedonism while failing to tell us a single thing we weren't already aware of. Instead, it felt as if this volatile personality was being pandered to, so any sympathy this show might evoke should be reserved for the people who have had to endure proximity with this charming but flippant narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we knew it was ridiculous from the get-go: a thriller about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or destroy all of humanity. We persevered out of sheer love for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One scarcely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately slicing Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. That's what you call giving up the ghost.

MobLand

Dodgy characters convening in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and wants its gangland drama back.

Actually, that is harsh on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many seem a bit dated now, but at least they didn’t endure the ignominy of having to accommodate baffling dialects. But there were plenty of other issues. Primarily that it was just profoundly boring; a conflict over narcotics territory between various cockney picaresques which felt a bit basic.

The Meghan Markle Series

Considering the degree to which she grinds the gears of certain ostentatiously enraged commentators, it’s almost easy to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s various ventures into quaint homemaking as intentional statements. But then you view them and are forced to admit that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware magazine animated; a poster for evening drinks with delusions of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, buzzing beehives, sentimental platitudes and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by immense, largely unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously interesting things to be discussed about both Victoria Beckham and her journey with vocation, self-image, self-worth. But for whatever reason, this three-part series opted not to explore them. Rather, the experience was akin to consuming a marketing brochure. She obviously has every right to resent what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But unfortunately, she failed to do herself any favours with this cagey non-event of a series.

The Inheritance

It had the potential to be the next cultural phenomenon – except even camper, with a famous star as a deceased benefactor and a sharp-tongued personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you ask for? As contestants battled it out, there was plenty of backstabbing and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s even now too confusing to detail what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up reeking of a programme that was trying way too hard to live up to something way beyond it.

Too Much

How does one succeed a show that captured a generation? The pressure was immense for this starry romcom about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who arrives in London with a broken heart. The lead actress seized the opportunity by the horns and was a delight to watch, reveling in Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very glossy and, paradoxically, was insufficient. Plus, the abundance of famous friends involved felt icky.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the smart recruitment of talented emerging comics, expectations were high. But sadly, most of it didn’t land. A particular sketch was a single joke milked to a dry pulp but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, meanwhile, simply inspired the idea that they should probably have stayed in there a while longer.

The Knox Dramatisation

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively showcased the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an interesting drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The material needed to be treated sensitively. Rather, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right tone, lurching from strangely jaunty, somewhat mannered farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Twisted? Perhaps. A total mess? Absolutely.

Prime Target

We admire the star … but did we buy him playing the greatest maths genius since, a man so intelligent he’s on the verge of a breakthrough that could ruin society? No! This international thriller about secret services targeting – and eliminating – academics frankly got more farcical by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This uncritical portrait followed the content creator renowned for sexual exploits as she undertook her most extreme feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we craved was way more examination of her true psyche, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the now-famous mum who showed up to haul her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific shots and zero critical analysis of her notoriety whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a young daughter too.

Tina Morrison
Tina Morrison

A seasoned travel writer with a passion for uncovering hidden gems in Las Vegas, sharing insider tips and vibrant city stories.